Francis is struggling to accept what he is! It is very new and he does not know where to stand and especially hard over the eyes of others ...
a monologue MATHAN - Excerpt:
"It was a taste of bitterness. Then write! What else to say, say what I can not say? ( A pause.) I can not even write it. (It inspires strong.) My heart like an anvil. I shut myself for hours in my room. I do nothing. I can not really thinking. It's like a sleepless night in the blinding light of day. White on white, it's crazy. Blur also like a photo without blurring the focus. If I drew a picture, there would be nothing. Nothingness . If I able to understand me. If I could rub my eyes to the reality in the eye, like a man. As a man ... I was scared. (Pause..) Virginia, it was so simple, obvious. Why my heart is saying no when reason says yes? If I could slip from friendship to love ... with ... Why not if the merger between it and me? Why does my heart refuses? I'd like to tame this one is my worst enemy, I know désormais.J 'I broke everything. I saw it coming, I knew. I left them we go to ... inevitability fatal Virginia would say, "inevitable fatal it's nice to you, your lack of optimism! "And I laugh. It would still be both happy. I have not always been like that before ... I do not believe in sadness, to fate. I was a happy child. I wish my mother noticing that my father makes me spill the beans. They forget to look at me or what? (Pause) Mom, she was surprised not to see Virginia's all. Dad on the phone, he does not know what I mean, I feel it. I think he understands better his adoptive son, it must be scary. And the reasons for my silence, you do not look for them? You Flipper too? All truths are not good to say ... But it will not work out, I know, deep down, it does not work out. And after the summer, fall ... What can I expect over the fall? Return to school, the band at which JP m'lâche not, loneliness, being away. Boredom killed! Virginia, my only friend, is no longer my friend. I do not feel the strength to reach out to others, not the strength to be rejected. Is it possible to send bottles into the sea when you live in the countryside? Write ... Write ... It's my last hope. "
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